I’ve been getting a good deal of support in the past months from lots of different folks. Come to think of it many aren’t walking in this world any longer; my Mom, my Dad, Rumi, Emily Dickinson, Steve Jobs, Joan Didion, Pema Chodrin, Melissa, Doug, Annie…and the list goes on. And I think how clever of me to have generated such a wonderful posse of support; especially now when life seems to feel so topsy-turvy. I know that many of you feel that way too so there’s no reason to go into my own boo-hoo story.
I just would like to share my gratitude. This feeling has been bringing me to my knees lately….that unbearable lightness of being. Everything feels bright and stark and so alive and fragile and precious. Is it possible to have that many feelings all at the same time? I believe (I’m afraid) so!
One of my deepest experiences has been my explosion into the world of my creative self, mostly through the use of my iPhone camera. Since June I’ve taken at least 1000 images and generated new renditions of the same image and experimenting with apps to create something completely new. This experience has really opened me up to the joy of creating and how the motivation for imagining and taking pictures has become second nature, spontaneous, a “why wouldn’t you” feeling for creating photography. So fulfilling.
And then there’s Pema Chodrin and an on-line retreat I took a few weeks ago. There she was 76, streaming live from Omega Institute in upstate New York and me sitting cozy in my warm home in New Mexico with my laptop. She spoke about her first teacher Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche, and his teaching as he referred to it as “Water Logic”. This teaching consists of three attributes to be aware of: trust, joy and holding your seat. Trust, that life will always teach you and will have a message to give you, if you are willing. Joy and appreciation, that every moment is always new and how we relate to this moment will show us how the next moment, the next day, the rest of our lives will be. And taking our seat, wherever you are in the world in this moment be fully present, be where you are embracing this time and “not exaggerating”. Taking our seat by taking responsibility (not control) of where we are.
Maybe it’s the Mayan calendar coming to an end (Pema Chodrin thinks the Mayans just ran out of stones), or my Dad’s passing and becoming a member of the Orphan’s club or putting an iPhone in my hands and watching in awe as my creative world explodes or my beautiful sons as they find their way in this world. What a potpourri of joy and love and creation and despair and fear and laughter and shear curiosity.
“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life…don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your own inner voice…and most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary. ~Steve Jobs~
Cross posted over at Vision & Verb. (link on your left)